Double Standards

As a female I can say that I often get the benefit of some double standards but when it comes to sex and relationships I often find myself floored by the the ideals both men and women have when it comes to women. I don't know why I can see both sides of the argument but for some reason I can. I can see why men think women play "games" and I can see why women think men can be full of shit. I don't really know where I fall. I can play games and I can be full of shit but I can always justify my reasoning for why certain people fall where they do in my categories that I have created to describe a general relationship with the people I come in contact with.

Of course I have my own double standard when it comes to the men and women in my life. With women you are either family or an acquaintance. I have about three friends in my life that are like my sisters. Yeah I have a sister (I think. I question some bloodlines but if my family calls her my sister than that is what I will call her for the sake of a title) but these particular three that share no blood with me are just as close as my sisters that I grew up with (I know they are my sisters. So what if we don't have the same mother or father, we were raised together and they are my sisters). I have to have these people in my life no matter what. Yeah that was complicated with all the parenthesis and what not but that is not the point. The point is, that I would do for my circle of sisters some shit that would agitate me if a male friend asked. If they asked me for $100 I would get it to them within hours as long as I have access to an ATM. If a male friend asked me for $20 not only would he not get it, I prolly wouldn't talk to him anymore. Yeah that's fucked up but its a stigma that is attached with females giving males money and I'm not down with how I would feel after passing some nigga money. It would have to be an emergency in their life for me to consider passing my dead presidents.

Now with men in my life they fall in a bevy of categories and they quickly can get demoted on one false move. It could be because when it comes to men there are so many alterior motives involved. I usually make the mistake of having a preconcieved use for most men when they enter my life. I know that's wrong because when you have preconceptions of people you basically set yourself up. When men don't turn out to be what you want them to be there will be a problem. It mostly happens when people don't reach your expectations. There are rare pleasent suprises when men exceed your expectations, but that's pretty rare. I'm working on keeping an open mind when I meet men but old habits are hard to break. Sadly at this point in my life the men I come only have penis working in their favor. They don't have contacts for business ventures, sense of humor, a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of, prospects for success in their future, or good reason to be around me. One can take that sentence and come to the conclusion that I might be a cold gold diggin bitch. That's not the case, I promise. Of course I'm not perfect and I realize that but I constantly work on my flaws. I'm not saying a dude needs to be on my level but I can't stand when people are content with the here and now. Have a goal and go get it.

I can't tell you how many dudes tell me that I play "games". I can't stand when they say this. It makes no sense to me because I'm not doing anything any different then them. I know on sight if a dude approaches me if I would give it up to him. Most women do whether they admit it or not. With this decision already made in my mind I decide whether they get a real number or if I change the last digit. Now, I'm not some crazy nutbucket hoe, just because you get a number doesn't mean I'm finna lay with you. Chances are you will talk yourself out of sex within the first conversation. Men do this same thing. They approach knowing that they will lay the female down if she lets them (or gets talked into it). This is where the game changes for men and women. When a woman decides she doesn't deem you worthy of her draws she is "playing games". When a man decides he is done with the woman for whatever the reason he is "full of shit". This is the part of the game I don't get. The bottom line is when people don't get what they want they move the hell on. Why all the salt? People decide what role they want to allow other people to play in their lives. Why is a woman deemed loose if she wants a jumpoff but a man is deemed a player? Why is a man deemed a good man for having standards that they want their girlfriend to possess before they settle, and a woman is deemed a gold digger (for lack of a better word) for not settling for a man that is beneath her?


*maybe soon I will break down the categories I put men in tomorrow or so if I'm inspired. Hopefully I do because I've been thinkin a lot on the topic internally. I guess it will be cool to see if my theories make sense when I read them on paper as if someone else wrote them. Damn this is a tangent but I often read some of the shit I write as if I didn't write it and think "damn that bitch is brilliant I wanna meet her, or this dumb trick sounds so stupid". I often hate my own ideals or think I'm a ghetto female Confucious who needs her own forum so she can reach the masses. LMAO literally! Who thinks this kind of stuff of themselves? Let me just publish this shit.